"It was nothing!" I lied and chanced fate by moving in to press myself against Jacob. He threw me aside and I bounced off the futon.
"You expect me to believe anything you say?" he yelled. "Silvano was right. You're just cheap shit. You mean nothing!"
"Don't you dare!" I yelled. "You fuckin' spy on me with a camera then accuse me for doing exactly what you want me to do?! You want Josh to fight! You want him to keep hoping I'm here for him and when I show him I care, you accuse me of cheating?! Don't you fuckin' dare!"
Jacob threw me back on the futon again. "I saw what you did with Miguel in the ring. I saw the way you kissed Josh. You think I'm stupid?!"
"You were the one that made me do stuff with Miguel. I didn't want to. You insisted! You have no right to turn that against me now. What did you want me to do? Refuse to follow your orders in front of everyone? Put on a poor show so they'd ask for their money back? I did it for you!"
"There are levels of engagement," he said, lowering his voice to a soft, monotoned level. "You went well beyond the call of duty. No one acts that well."
"Really?" I said, rising up to face him again. "So by your own logic, what do we have? Every moment, every game, every climax we've ever shared. Every pang of jealousy you're feeling - is that real too? Or do the rules change when it suits you? Does it count for nothing when I see you with another man and want to get even?"
My voice caught as I realised the truth of what I'd just said. I was growing to hate him, but he was still mine and I had every right to hate the thought of him with another man. I saw the look of surprise on Jacob's face.
"You chose Miguel, not me," I said. "You could have got anyone to fuck him but you chose to do it yourself. How do you think that made me feel? What am I? Some kind of two-bit disposable toy that you pull out when you've got nothing better to play with?"
"It wasn't like that…" Jacob said, suddenly apologetic.
"Don't you fucking dare! I don't want to hear your excuses! It's all about you! You expect me to be loyal to you but don't give a shit about me. It's a two-way street, baby! I've had enough! I can't do this any more. If you think that lowly about me, then that's what I'll be. I'll live down to your expectations and you can reap what you bloody well sow!"
"Harry! I'm sorry!" Jacob pleaded, grabbing my arms. "It's not like that. You misunderstood me. I didn't mean to accuse you. I was jealous, that's all. You mean the world to me. What we have is special."
"So I thought!" I snapped, and pulled away from him.
"Don't be like this!" Jacob begged, wrapping his arms around me. "Please! I'm sorry. I can see it now. I didn't think. You've proven yourself to me time and time again. I know you were doing it for me. I can see that. I can!"
I turned to look at him. How had the conversation suddenly turned? I looked deep into his eyes and saw the desperation within. For the first time ever, I realised Jacob really cared. In his own, inimitable way, his feelings surpassed the sex and the games into something much more profound.
I kissed him, hard and desperately, grabbing his head to stop him from pulling away. There was no need though. He responded just as hard and we grunted as passion enveloped us completely. We fell to the mattress and entwined our arms and legs, craving each other like there was no tomorrow.
Side by side, we lay fervently kissing while our hands stroked each other's backs and our groins thrust against each other. I rolled on top of Jacob and wrapped my arms around his head, refusing to end our kiss. His fingers dug into my back, massaging between my shoulder blades.
I moaned at the pleasure of feeling the tension release. He slid his lips down to my neck. I enjoyed the shiver that ran through my body as he suckled the skin before pulling back, hovering over him. We were both panting and smiling. Holding myself up on one hand, I fondled his nipple with the other, then slid my hand to his throat.
"Have you ever been choked while you cum?" I asked. He smirked and I added, "I know you like things rough."
The sight of his biceps tensing as he grabbed at the sheets turned me on. He was struggling for breath but still refused to submit to my choke. His dick was so hard that my hand was full with the throbbing mass. It was throbbing and thrusting on it's own, building to a climax that could strike any moment.
I kisses his blue lips, wondering if it was lost in the pins and needles prickling his swelling face. Jacob was arching up beneath me but still refusing to struggle. His faith made me want to please him even more. I tugged harder at his cock, wishing it was completely free from the confines of his jeans. I saturated his chest with my kisses, releasing the pressure on his throat temporarily so he could let air in.
I ripped off his jeans as fast as I could, then wrapped both hands around his throat, pressing down with my body weight while my groin rubbed against his. He was so close to climax that he exploded within seconds. His arms stretched out above him in total submission as his body convulsed and his eyes bulged. I felt the warm squirt of semen drown my stomach as I shifted my grip from his throat to his wrists. Jacob gasped in air, the rush heightening his climax. He spasmed underneath me and I held him down, suffocating him with kisses until the orgasm ceased.
Jacob lay there unmoving, save for his panting. I lay on top of him, enjoying the feel of his heaving body. Even on top of him, the aura of his masculinity made me feel safe. It was a comfort I couldn't deny, only now I had both Josh and Miguel playing on my mind too. The difference between love, lust and infatuation had become muddled. I had feelings for all three of them and I could no longer tell which feelings were real.
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